JoJoConejo

7/10

I appreciated that the choice was not to [spoiler] have them get together and either break up during a relapse, or fight together against all odds till a happy ending. But it felt that something was a bit off, even in the dysfunctionality and codependency? I'm not sure what. Maybe it was just messy and undefined as sometimes is in life, and I could really get a feel for it [/spoiler]. The self hatred and constant noise that your head makes, the way it gets louder and louder the more you try to make it stop - was physically painful to watch, and therefore wonderfully depicted. Not only in the rapid visual editing to other people's body parts, but also through [spoiler] Riley's relation with her phone. It's the thing she turns to when she's in pain and eating or starving isn't enough, the tool that feeds her obsession, that validates her feeling of inadequacy. Sometimes if you can't escape from something, from some demons, it feels easier to validate them, to put yourself even more down rather than facing the terrifying reality that at that moment you aren't capable of progressing, of getting away from them. So you sort of embrace the darkness even tighter. [/spoiler] The only part that I felt was a little bit lacking - and I know I'm not speaking for everyone who goes through such mental and physical illnesses - was [spoiler] the awareness that you're hurting people. It's true, sometimes in your worst moments you are so lost that you don't realize it or don't care cause pain and your own head's noise is too loud. But I feel that more often than not, in movies there's this portrayal of mental illness as something that you live through sort of unaware of how you're affecting others. Sometimes it is, sometimes not. Sometimes you can't do anything to avoid hurting others, but you're well aware that you are doing so. And you can't stop, and that hurts even more, adding to your pain. Here Riley is told that she is self-absorbed and narcissistic etc, but I'd like to see as well from the person itself this chilling awareness. Not in the end, on the way to improvement. But throughout the worst times [/spoiler]. All in all was a fresh and beautiful depiction, and two moments, two lines stuck with me the most: - [spoiler] "you only like being f**ked by things that hate you as much as you hate yourself". Which is about way more that the actual f**king. It's about all that self hatred I mentioned before and the validation of it, and how one feed the other. It's why so many people are unable to stick by people who care for them, and instead cyclically go for those who validate that contempt in which you hold yourself. [/spoiler] - [spoiler] "that's disgusting", when Riley's eating off the bin. Seeing in someone's eyes when they look at you at your lowest, unable to hide their disgust even tho they love you - and even verbalize it... it's something you don't forget. It's a gaze and a sensation that haunts you maybe not forever, but certainly for years if you're lucky enough to be able to work your way to a better mental place. [/spoiler] It's a complex and faceted issue, mental health in general. But I'm always glad to be able to discuss about it, step by step with awareness and different sides of it portrayed - we'll be able to work through it better and better. And take care y'all

Sipps

9/10

Spoilers

Brittany Snow's directorial debut film and tbh it's really good... I get it, the body dysmorphia disorder, cause we 90s kids grew up watching b-wood movies where all the heroines are in perfect shape and beautiful.. I too was and still struggling with beautifulness and body image... But thank god I am not this toxic mentally that you have adopted the whole personality into it... It must be hard around people like her, especially when you clearly know this person is not even in the slightest way "fat" or come in this category... I really understand the body dysmorphia, but I don't understand why thin people have this... Cause I at least know that I don't have a perfect body but I also appreciate that I am not "fat" or "obese" when I look at other people who are genuinely overweight... But that's just me... Cause I am watching my mom struggling with her obesity and it's really hard to see her like this and I have sworn myself that I will take care of myself and my body... And I will help my mom to be atleast loose some weight... 🏽🏽🏽 This movie is really good but I truly hate this type of people who are thin and have a perfect shape and still compare... I mean, I want to ask these dysmorphic disorder people, how they see overweight people or just normal body shape people. Are they judging them hard ??? Anyhow, I hated the main character but I think I liked the vibe & story of this film, which kept me engaging... And I think the ending felt so much right and honestly good for Ethan cause no1 wants to deal with a person who has this mental disorder... And so much obsessed with herself that she doesn't care about her friend's life and around her... But I guess it also explains why, cause she's rich and does not have to worry about money that's why her whole personality is this disorder. Urgh rich people disorder I guess 😅🏽‍♀:information_desk_person_tone3:‍♀