First time I watched this film I was a kid, I really had no idea of what I was watching, but I knew it felt earth-shattering. Second time I watched it, I knew it was a love story, I knew they couldn't be together because they were gay, that was about all that I could understand, no nuances, but still... earth-shattering. Have watched it maybe 12 times in total. Every single time, earth-shattering. Tonight was my most recent rewatch, the first one in a couple of years. The first one after studying film in university. The first one after watching so. many. different. kinds. of. movies. trying to catch up on all the ones I missed before I found the love I have for this art form. Little did I know... no matter what film I watch, the one I watched when I was way too young to understand half of what it really meant, what it really represented - or the reasons as to why it's one of the most beautiful things I have ever had the privilege to watch -, would always be the one every other movie would have to live up to. My experience watching it this time around was familiar, as it always is. Like always, I could recite every big scene, I knew most sequences by heart, but Ennis and Jack feel more real than ever to me, now. I feel like for the very first time I really understood the full scope of their emotions, and bonded with them more than I had ever before. I was also blown away by the technical aspects of it too, Ang Lee's incredible talent. I understood it was a beautiful movie before, but now I can see just how beautiful it is. And is there even a way of putting Jake and Heath's performance into words? To me there isn't. All they had was Brokeback Mountain, and I will always have Brokeback Mountain too.

100000000000000000000000/10